Overcoming Resistance to the Divine Feminine Energy & Embracing the Goddess Warrior

A few years ago I started on a journey to embrace my Divine Feminine energy. For me, this was no easy task. I felt like I was trying to fit the round peg into the square hole. It felt like I was trying to be somebody I wasn't... but I wanted to be. 

What I wanted to tap into was a softer, nurturing side... a kinder, gentler version of myself. I thought of a dainty, demur, calm woman that exuded a soft radiance who didn't walk, she floated and wore flowy dresses and flower crowns. 

So let me set the stage for what I'm like...

My size 9 shoes balance my 5'10" frame with hands the size of a wolf's paw (pic below 🐺). My Nana called me Gracie as a sarcastic term of endearment to overcompensate for the fact that I'm "a bull in a China shop," as she would so affectionately say. I'm a natural born leader, generally dominant. My passion can be mistaken for aggression. My humor replaced with sarcasm. My laugh is comparable to the cackle of coyotes. I don't really care what people think of me. I violate society's guidelines for political correctness just for fun. I'm Unapologetically, authentically me. 

As you can see, I don't fit the script for the Divine Feminine narrative I concocted in my mind. My resistance strengthened as the vision of the "perfect woman" grew perfectly imperfect the more this vision slipped away from me. To make matters worse, and perhaps as part of my own defense mechanism, my perception soon became even more distorted. What was once an image of beauty inside and out twisted into a new, distorted narrative of the Divine Feminine as being passive, submissive and weak. She now appeared to me as a people pleaser with no boundaries living a life of what the world wanted to see her as and not as she wanted to be. My resistance turned to repulsion and n y journey was taking me even further away from my mission of embracing this Divine Energy.

I resolved my commitment to embracing the Divine Feminine. I read books, participated in workshops, immersed myself in a spiritual retreat, journaled, repeated affirmations, meditated, and started practicing yoga. I felt great, but I still didn't fit the mold. Round peg meet square hole.

I couldn't figure out what the problem was. That's when the Universe decided to throw me a bone, as it usually does. There's a strange phenomenon that's common amongst therapists. Whenever we're experiencing a problem in our personal life, we suddenly see client after client coming to us for help with the same problem and that's exactly what happened. Sometimes I think we're starring in our own reality show of "Punk'd" (minus Ashton Kutcher) for the mere entertainment of our Spirit Team. 

Within a few weeks I had an influx of female clients wanting to explore their Divine Feminine Energy and, they too, created the same narrative of resistance that I did. I was not crazy! Well maybe a little... but I was not alone! Working with each client allowed me to take a step back and assess the problem more objectively and with compassion. I gradually let go of the old narrative of the Divine Feminine. I didn't know yet what I would replace it with but I trusted the answers would come when I was ready to accept it... and sure enough it did. 

One day during a meditation the words "Goddess Warrior" filled my conscious awareness with epic visions of Athena, Venus and Aphrodite. And, of course, what Goddess Warrior montage would be complete without Wonder Woman?! Something clicked within me! Now this felt right and aligned with my authentic self! These Goddesses are not weak, submissive women who could be easily taken advantage of. They are strong, fierce and beautifully feminine.

I immediately did an internet search for "Goddess Warrior" not having any idea what I would find. In addition to finding out this is a very common problem among women and society as a whole, I came across a book that peaked my interest, "Goddess Warrior Training" by Heatherash Amara and began my training the next day. 

I realized that I had been searching for the divine feminine externally instead of internally. I realized I was waiting for someone else to give me permission and create a safe enough space for me to step into this Divine Feminine Energy. And then I threw out the term "Divine Feminine" and replaced it with Goddess Warrior Energy. This one simple step released me of my resistance and opened up a whole new journey to me. I realized that this energy looks and feels different for everyone. I created a new narrative of what this Divine Energy means and looks like for me.

I see the Goddess Warrior as the best of both worlds between the masculine and feminine energy. She is fiercely protective of what is right and just. She leads with Love and Compassion but her kindness should never be taken for weakness. She fights only when she needs to and for the Highest Good of all. And when she fights, she wins! She is a force of Divine Energy that can effortlessly protect you from the storm and just as effortlessly become the storm. (Add pic of pic in bedroom). 

She is me 

I am her

Fully and completely whole

Embraced and empowered 

In the Divine Goddess Warrior Energy 🌟